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Clmate change - action required

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AlanW
Posts: 59
Joined: January 7th, 2013, 6:35 pm
Your Full Name: Alan Wilson
Boat Name: Kiitaja

Clmate change - action required

Post by AlanW » April 1st, 2019, 7:45 am

One of the effects of climate change (unless you happen to be, or have recently been, Donald Trump) is the increasing rise in sea level: this, of course, affects berth holders directly.

It is possible that the increase will raise boats higher than normal: since boats are tied to pontoons, the mooring ropes may hold boats down with the unwanted effect of water ingress, which may make your feet wet next time you are on board.

A cunning plan has been devised by the Management to counter this problem, by the affixing by berth holders of balloons round their boats' waterline: this will enable boats to rise further due to the displacement of an equal volume of water (refer to Archimedes of Syracuse, who unfortunately is currently unavailable for comment).

Extensive tank testing has shown the optimum placement of standard balloons to be one balloon per 2.69 metres of boat length: berth holders are strongly advised to place the balloons symmetrically along both sides of the boat, for reasons which will become apparent if you don't.

As a service to berth holders, packets of party balloons are available from the Office (one packet per boat only, please): due to budget cuts & Brexit, regrettably berth holders must provide their own bits of string.

Sausage balloons should be affixed horizontally (in contrast to sausage dogs, which should be affixed vertically, preferably front end up).

May you have a joyous & frivolous sailing season.

1st April 2019

polo
Posts: 306
Joined: January 9th, 2013, 11:25 am
Your Full Name: Robin Kemp
Boat Name: POLO 4

Re: Clmate change - action required

Post by polo » April 1st, 2019, 10:49 am

Nice one Alan. I presume the balloons are only available today only.

AlanW
Posts: 59
Joined: January 7th, 2013, 6:35 pm
Your Full Name: Alan Wilson
Boat Name: Kiitaja

Re: Clmate change - action required

Post by AlanW » April 1st, 2019, 11:29 am

Sorry, I should have made that clear. Please ask at the Office for your free packet of party balloons, today only.

challenge2
Posts: 115
Joined: January 17th, 2015, 5:10 pm
Your Full Name: Robert Gant
Boat Name: Challenge II

Re: Clmate change - action required

Post by challenge2 » April 1st, 2019, 1:08 pm

Must be an April fool joke cos you said the balloons 🎈 were free!
Bob & Anne
Challenge II

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